Shhhh. Don't Say The H-Word

George Carlin had the 7 words that you can't say on television. My Dad had the 2 words you couldn't say in the house without getting a belt welting. And now the political media has proclaimed the 1 word you can't say during the presidential campaign. Shhhh. Don't say the H-Word. It's bad. It'll make people think the wrong thing. It will make you feel all dirty inside. Oh, and that's not all. Using that kind of language just proves that you're base and stupid. Just ask the refined and brilliant Rev. Jeremiah Wright.

"Please run and tell my stuck-on-stupid friends that Arabic is a language -- is a language, it is not a religion," he said. "Barack HUSSEIN Obama," he said, emphasizing the Illinois senator's middle name dramatically, "Barack HUSSEIN Obama, Barack HUSSEIN Obama. There are Arabic-speaking Christians, there Arabic-speaking Jews, Arabic-speaking Muslims and Arabic-speaking atheists. Arabic is a language, it is not a religion. Stop trying to scare folks by giving them this Arabic name like it's some disease."

So, don't use the H-word. It doesn't matter if it's Barack's middle name. It doesn't matter if we use presidential middle names all the time like John Quincy Adams, Franklin Delano Roosevelt, John Fitzgerald Kennedy, Richard Milhous Nixon, Ronald Wilson Reagan, George Herbert Walker Bush, William Jefferson Clinton, or even "W" himself. No, Barack HUSSEIN Obama's middle name is verboten. Using it is malicious and, and, well . . . naughty to the max.

If you absolutely (and I mean "absolutely") must make some reference to his full name than I suppose it's acceptable to use just the middle initial, which would surprisingly suit the savior status his surly supporters afford him. Barack H. Christ. I like it.