2008: Strange Story Of The Year

Like every other year on this spinning sphere (or more accurately, "spinning oblate spheroid"), there was a lot of weird stuff that happened in 2008. There were the hunters who bagged Bigfoot, the pregnant dude, the man on mars and countless other freaky events. But of all the strange stories this year, which was the strangest? Now, my first fancy for Strange Story of the Year is to go easy street with the pregnant daddy, but since Thomas Beatie isn't really a man and has recently diminished the novelty by getting knocked up again, I just gotta turn elsewhere.

So, as a fan of "the sweet science" (though not as dedicated a fan as I once was) my vote for strangest story of 2008 goes to WBC Heavyweight Boxing Champion Vitali Klitschko and his treatment for post-fight swollen fists.

"Baby wee is good because it's pure, doesn't contain toxins and doesn't smell," Klitshcko said. "I wrap nappies filled with my 3 year-old son Max's wee around my fists. The nappies hold the liquid and the swelling stays down."

So he wraps urine drenched diapers around his hands on purpose to cure swollen fist. Seriously, he couldn't come up with a better remedy? No wonder his country was on the losing side of the cold war. Of course, I've always said that professional athletes are pampered.

So what is your choice for 2008 Strange Story of the Year?

Fidal Castro: The Bloody Hero To . . . Who? (Or is that "whom"?)

Jimmy Carter, who has never met an anti-American dictator that he didn't tongue, praised the "generosity" of Fidel Castro's Cuba during a speech on Cuban television in which he also took time to commiserate with his Marxists chums about America's human rights violations and racist legal system. Michael Moore, who never met a roast beef sandwich that he didn't tongue, used is overtly obvious knowledge of good health to produce a film anointing Cuba a medical mecca, apparently unaware that aspirin and Pepto-Bismol are about as common as free speech and Asian cheerleaders on the Island.

Fidel Castro has become a bit of a hero to some on the left. To them he is the super cool killer with a heart of gold. He is the underdog who spreads a special tyranny within sight of Old Glory. And perhaps most endearing to some, he really hates America.

Well, in my book it's past time to remember who Fidel Castro really is. Let's move beyond twisted Spicolian PR support and examine the butcher's record. There's a reason America has sanctions against Cuba. And there's a reason those sanctions should be kept in place until the Castro brothers' reign of terror has finally been brought to an end (even if they do produce cigars that are worth lung disease).

Gary Baumgarten has posted an English translation of great piece that was originally published in El Nuevo Herald on December 19, 2008. It is worth the read.

Bloody Tally Of A 50-Year-Long Dictatorship

Israel Delivers Gaza Strip Beatdown

After months of suffering rocket attacks in its southern towns, Israel delivered a powerful message to Hamas: If you want to attack us there will be a heavy price to pay.

Israel closed the areas around the Gaza Strip, declaring it a military zone, then launched the deadliest attacks the strip has seen in years.

Ehud Barak explained:

"We have stretched our hand in peace many times to the Palestinian people. We have nothing against the people of Gaza. But this is an all-out war against Hamas and its branches. The restraint that we have demonstrated is the source of our strength when it is time to fight."

For three days Israel's air force has pounded Hamas targets. Oy. And it ain't over yet. For the Jewish nation this isn't about Star of David bumper stickers, it's about survival . . . and they take that pretty seriously.

Naturally, the current White House came down on the right side of the issue with National Security Council spokesman Gordon Johndroe's enunciation of the obvious:

"In order for the violence to stop, Hamas must stop firing rockets into Israel and agree to respect a sustainable and durable ceasefire."

Now, if you want a tight take on the story, head over to Great Satan's Girlfriend and check out what Courtney has to say: STRIP BLITZ.

Another Vacation For Obama?

Do you remember how Michael Moore spouted complaints from his blow hole that Dubya was always on vacation during times of trouble? How about the media kidney cramps we had to endure every time Bush took a trip to his ranch? Why, if I didn't know any better I'd think the left actually hated vacations because they admire hard work, but that's about as likely as Rosie O'Donnell admiring an empty plate. No, the party of walking welfare and dependency simply wanted to take any opportunity to attack a Republican president.

As Academic Elephant observes:

I hate to go all Grinchy the day after Christmas, but can anyone tell me why is it okay for Barack Obama to spend Christmas during the worst economic downturn in decades in the course of which thousands of Americans face losing their homes in Hawaii in a 9 million dollar house body surfing and playing golf when it is not okay for the leader of the free world who has been presiding over two wars for several years to clear brush at the rather modest ranch he owns in Texas during hurricane season?

Good question. Since I doubt that the media is embarrassed by our current president's modesty, I suspect it has something to do with . . . oh . . . the "(R)".

H/T: Tigerhawk

How Do We Kick Minnesota Out Of The Union?

I'm not saying that we have to do anything yet, but if they actually elect Al Franken to the U.S. Senate, something has to be done to keep these half wits from further damaging our country.

A few years ago they elected a boa wearing professional wrestler to run their state (a buffoon who actually believes that the U.S. was behind 9/11). Fine. I accept that everybody gets liquored up every once in a while before casting an important vote. So they picked a psycho Governor. But then they went and elected Senator Amy Klobuchar, who has the intellectual horse power of an idiot savant sans the savant.

Now they may just give us Senator Al Franken? Are you friggin' kidding me?

Something has to be done to stop these people. State impeachment, a lutefisk ban, Paul Bunyan is sent to fill those lakes back in . . . something has to be done. I can hardly believe that Franken could be competitive in a race, any race, much less win a U.S. Senate seat. If he does, there has to be something we saner states can do to protect ourselves from the land of a thousand flakes.

Snooper Who Snipered Joe The Plumber Resigns

Oh, how the Democrats hated him. He became "everyman" to the country, which meant the left needed to treat him as they tend to treat every man by attempting to crush any apparent adherence to self-reliance. Lordy how they hate folk who don't need them.

Joe the Plumber became public enemy number 3 (even this brash baldy couldn't pass Dubya and American Values atop the liberal hit list). Joe Biden ridiculed him, the media investigated him and SNL attempted to become funny again through incongruous "Joe the Plumber is invisible" jokes. The left would stop at nothing to discredit the man who cleverly tricked Obama into revealing his distribution of wealth ideology . . . cleverly tricked him asking the chosen one a straight question for which he hadn't scripted an answer yet. So they would "stop at nothing," and that included the illegal procurement of Joe's records.

Ah, but no foul deed goes unpunished and the heat applied by bloggers and a very, (very) few in the main stream media did result in some fallout from the attacks. According to Michelle Malkin:

Lead Ohio government snooper Helen Jones-Kelley resigned from her job and two of her cohorts were canned as a result of their plundering through Joe the Plumber’s records.

So, we have the resignation. Dare we hope for incarceration?

Catwoman Dies

One of the iterations of the rogue/heroine Catwoman has passed away . . . the Batman legend tells us that she's one of nine (oh wait, my geek is showing).

Eartha Kitt died of Colon Cancer at age 81.

I knew her best as Julie Newmar's replacement as Catwoman on that old Batman TV series, but it should especially be noted during this holiday season that she was a talented singer who, in 1954, recorded the Christmas classic "Santa Baby."

Rest with God, Eartha

Happy Christmas To All

Since many of you are not on Khaki's naughty list (and thus forced to receive snail mail from me containing an obligatory card, picture of my kids and whatever else might be found in the envelope) I've decided to post a portion of what I sent out to family and friends here.

Last year it was a Christmas letter.

This year it is a Christmas Poem.

So, Happy Holidays to all y'all out in the blogosphere

A Christmas Poem

From The Khaki Elephant

'T was the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, thanks to delouse
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care
Each with a name so we don't have to share

The children were nestled all snug in their beds

After teaspoons of Benadryl knocked them out dead
Mama in her kerchief and I in my cap
(Quite an embarrassing sight as we nap)

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter
I loaded my 12 gauge to settle the matter
Away to the window I lurched like Babe Ruth
Slipped on a Lego and busted a tooth

The moon on the breast of the new fallen snow
Lit up my unshoveled driveway down below
When what to my wondering eye should appear
But a toy laden sleigh (oh those poor, poor reindeer)

A swaying thick driver, red-nosed I could see
It was either St. Nick or Ted Kennedy
More rapid than eagles his coursers they came
I love the word "coursers" but he called them by name

"Now, Dasher! Now, Dancer! Now Prancer and Vixen!"
(Who named these Reindeer? Sarah Palin while blitzen'd?)
"To the top of the porch! To the top of the walls!
Be careful, we don't have insurance for falls."

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly
When FEMA then handles their business so sly
So up to the housetop the courser they flew
(I used the word "coursers" again just for you)

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof
No doubt costly damage from each tiny hoof
As I drew in my head and was turning around
There stood Ol' Santa, for now safe and sound

He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his boot,
(Either that was some fake fur or Santa can shoot!)
A bundle of toys he had flung on his back,
And I wondered if batteries where too in that sack.

His eyes, how they twinkled! His dimples, how merry!
But his elves looked a little bit creepy and scary.
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
And his beard was filled with brown cookies and snow.

The stump of his pipe he held tight in his teeth,
(Great example, dear Santa, got a cigarette wreath?)
He had a broad face and a little round belly
A sign he's been hitting the doughnuts with jelly

He was chubby and plump and jolly, no strife
So I set down my shotgun and gave him his life
He gave to know I had nothing to dread
"Til Obama is Prez and we're all seeing red.

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
And just for a moment I thought, "What a jerk."
But laying his finger aside of his nose
I knew it was "giving" not "taking" he chose

He sprang up to his sleigh, to his team gave a shout
And I felt I would miss him till next year no doubt
But he gave one last gift as he called taking flight
"Happy Christmas to all and to all a good night!"

This Christmas, Give The Gift That Keeps On Giving

Smoke it one year and hack it up for the next 30. And now that there's another smoker heading for the White House . . . Happy Holidays!

Rick Warren Demonized . . . Huh?

Am I the only one who finds it astoundingly amusing (and by "astoundingly amusing" I mean "dangerously disturbing") that the left is attacking Rick Warren, who they perceive as a conservative cleric, because Obama chose him to spend a few minutes saying an inaugural prayer . . .

But those same liberals defended the 20 years Barack Obama spent under . . . 20 years of spiritual mentorship, marital support, influence and baptism of his children communing with . . . 20 years of hate mongering, racism, anti-American rhetoric through . . . 20 . . . 20 . . . 20 years with this guy?

A Barack Obama Nativity Scene . . . Including Michelle?

Try to keep the yikity yak from coming back after this one.

An Italian store is selling international political figurines to add to your nativity scene. The top sellers? Barack and Michelle Obama.

Apparently the new Messiah may be the reason for the season after all.

H/T: Common Cents

Congressman Joe Knollenberg Says Goodbye

For 16 years he served the state of Michigan with honor and honesty. Today Congressman Joe Knollenberg said goodbye to a gathering of supporters as he prepares for life after Washington.

Joe's voice of reason will be missed in the D.C. halls where his work for Michigan and the rest of the country have always been a welcome respite from typical Congressional cop outs.

Thanks for everything, Joe.

May the best in life come to you.

And as my farewell gift to you, please accept this majestic image of Kimba the White Lion leading his faithful followers as you led the way for us all those years (and we can just ignore the creepy fact that Kimba used to sleep on his dead father's skin . . . a detail that always gave me the willies, even as a kid).

Senate Republican Tells Detroit, DROP DEAD

I'm a Republican. I struggle to be right handed, sleep in little elephant jammies, and say "Bully" when the mood strikes me. But right now I've just got to be honest and admit that I'd love to stick a tusk up Tennessee Republican Bob Corker's grandstanding ass. Corker (who's state benefits greatly from foreign auto manufacturing so has nothing parochially to gain from a successful GM) claimed that the UAW's failure to take pay cuts was the sole reason the bridge loan failed. He then . . . this guy who allowed billions of unfettered dollars to be doled to incompetent banks . . . said that America could not afford to give additional money to the auto companies without his bullet points of restriction.

Well first of all, Bob, the UAW did not fail to take pay cuts. In fact, they agreed to set up a process for wage regulation that included federal representation; they just didn't want the specifics determined before the process began. Beyond that, Bob, this is not a "bailout" but a bridge loan. Finally, Bob, the money is not a slop bucket of new funds for the industry, but providing liquidity for support from funds that were already intended for transportation technology.

I don't mind somebody standing up for the integrity of their beliefs even when I disagree with them. But I hate when somebody I usually agree with takes a stand by twisting the truth for integrity's appearance. I never fear the attacks of an opponent, but I do fear the ignorance of a friend.

Of course, I will give Corker this much, his daughter knows how to party.

Oh, and thanks to Paul W. Smith for the title idea.

Cap Always Seems To Get It Right

UPDATE: Nick over at Right Michigan asked where the quote above comes from. It's actually not from a Captain America comic, but from Amazing Spider-Man #537, where Cap gives Spider-Man an explanation as to why he is standing against government regulation (really) of superheroes.

SOLD! Illinois Senate Seat

I know how stunned we all were to learn that there was more government corruption in Illinois . . . which is to say, it was about as stunning as when George Michael was jerked out of the closet. They've got Tony Rezko, Christopher G. Kelly, a long and storied tradition of Democratic Lazarus voters, why this state makes "earn $1,000 a day from home" scams seem legit.

Now we find Governor Rod Blagojevich, who should have been locked up years ago for that cheesy smile, under arrest for trying to sell the Senate spot vacated by Barack Obama. Perhaps he thought fair is fair since Obama recently bought the White House.

According to Fox News:

U.S. Attorney Patrick Fitzgerald on Tuesday accused Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich of participating in a "political corruption crime spree" that was a blatant effort to sell the state's U.S. Senate seat in the latest "pay-to-play" scheme in Illinois politics.

"He has been arrested in the middle of what we can only describe as a political corruption crime spree," Fitzgerald said in a news conference to announce the charges against the governor and his chief of staff. "This is a sad day for government. It's a very sad day for Illinois government. Governor Blagojevich has taken us to a truly new low."

Usually Senators are the ones being bought, but never let it be said that an Illinois politician can't think outside of the box. So how much does a Senate seat go for these days?

The 76-page FBI affidavit alleges that Blagojevich was taped conspiring to sell or trade Obama's vacated U.S. Senate seat for financial and other personal benefits for himself and his wife, including an annual salary of $250,000-$300,000 at a nonprofit foundation or an organization affiliated with labor unions.

Ol' Abe Lincoln would be spinning in his grave, if he wasn't actually from Kentucky.

Sarah Palin Snubs Oprah

Of course, as reported by CNN the Palin camp is denying that it is a "snub." According to Sarah Palin's communications director and press secretary, Bill McAllister, “The governor was invited to appear [on the Oprah Winfrey Show]. She was also invited to appear on Letterman, Leno, Stephanopoulos, The Daily Show. She passed on a vast majority of these requests." So it was nothing personal. Right?

Oprah response:

"I said I would be happy to talk to Sarah Palin when the election was over…" she said in an interview with the entertainment show Extra. "I went and tried to talk to Sarah Palin and instead she talked to Greta[Van Susteren]. She talked to Matt [Lauer]. She talked to Larry [King]. But she didn't talk to me.”

Sounds like the queen of daytime self-indulgence is a little bit snitty. Perhaps she thinks that Sarah Palin is ignoring her show because she refused to have Palin as a guest during the election cycle while supporting Barack Obama. Hmmmm. But why should one of the most popular women in America, a governor and newly found voice within the Republican party, decide to go on a show that has had declining ratings and a host who has become less popular all year . . . the same year that the host decided to raise oodles of cash for her presidential candidate? Hmmmm.

And why should we bother to watch a show where the host leverages her celebrity for political gain while wallowing in self-love?

Stick to your guns, Sarah! Um, I mean that figuratively in this case. You need Oprah like OJ Simpson needs another trial.

Pastor Beaten While Decorating The Church

A couple of thugs jumped Pastor Dennis Warman at his parish, the Church of the Valley in Highland, out in California (where reality often intersects unreality) and beat him nearly to death for . . . his wallet? ABC covered the story.

Looks like two more tickets punched for the hell express.

Gitmo Got Mo' Before Obama Shuts It Down

Looks like the cruel treatment that has Obama chewing on a plan to close the Guantanamo Bay Detention Camp has gotten a few more terrorists to spill their lentils, according to CNN.

Five detainees at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, say they want to confess to conspiracy charges for planning the September 11, 2001, attacks, a Pentagon spokeswoman said Monday.

Oh, tell me more . . .

Khalid Sheikh Mohammed -- the confessed architect of the attacks, who was captured two years later in Pakistan -- and four other alleged co-conspirators asked a military judge if they could withdraw all pending motions and plead guilty, Maj. Gail Crawford said in an e-mail.

The defendants announced their decision in front of relatives of victims in the al Qaeda-orchestrated attacks, said Jennifer Daskal, senior counterterrorism counsel for Human Rights Watch. She attended Monday's hearing.

Quick, we'd better close that place down before more freedom hating terrorist confess too much about how and why they do what they do. We wouldn't want that kind of unfair advantage in the war against terror now would we?

Been Slackin'

Never, I mean never crack a nut with your teeth if you don't have dental insurance. The initial pain isn't anything compared to the wallet wilt later. Ouch!

Anyway, been a rough couple of weeks to blog what with a cracked tooth, heavy workload, falling snow and preppin' to celebrate the birth of baby Jesus.

But I'm back at ya.

Bailouts: Why The Auto Industry Is Different

Sure, I'm hesitant to bite the hand that feeds me . . . and feeds my kids . . . and also pays for my Dr. Pepper habit, occasional cigars and Internet access, but there are legitimate reasons why even a fiscal "keep the government out of our business" conservative like me supports the idea of a government loan to the auto industry.

I was against the banking bailout since it did little more than feed a habitual harlot and her corrupt congressional pimps. And I'm also against an open door bailout policy where billionaire panhandlers show up in Washington looking for a tax-burdening handouts.

But the auto industry is different.

First of all, we are talking about millions of jobs. The latest estimates are between 1 - 5 million could be lost, depending on what happens to automotive suppliers who depend on the Big 3 for their livelihood (including hundreds of small businesses). When both sides of the aisle are talking about stimulus packages in hopes to produce a million or so new jobs, it would be self-destructive luncacy to allow the failure of job sustaining machines that already exist.

Secondly, though the Big Three have made their share of mistakes, much of their failure was outside of their control . . . and most of the blame can be laid at our government's feet. For example, government imposed CAFE standards consistently mandate fuel standards without regard to current technologies, forcing the Big 3 to invest and retool when there is no money to do so. In addition, unfair trade practices allow import vehicles to saturate the American market without reciprocal open policies for shipping U.S. cars to their countries. And the icing: labor costs are much higher for the Big 3 than most of their competitors. It's tough to compete when your own side ties your feet together.

Third -- I'm on point three, right? OK, thirdly, the congress has refused to "drill, baby, drill" which has put the American auto industry in the hands of foreign oil producers and their distribution whims. Yes, we all agree that alternative fuel sources are needed, but we're not there yet and we won't be for a few years. Without a solid energy policy the American auto industry and its future (regardless of fuel source) is in the hands of foreign oil-producing governments, many of whom would love to see America in economic chaos.

Fourth . . .ly, the automotive industry has long been a cog in our national defense. In times of war the auto plants have shifted production to develop military transportation and technology as needed. Jeep and Hummer have had your back.

Five golden rings.

Finally (and number 6), if we are to find alternative fuels in the near future we will need the technologies of a strong automotive industry to do so. The auto industry is a launching pad for innovation and a proving ground for ideas.

I agree that any loan from the government needs to come with a plan from the manufacturers; a plan that proves the money will not just be a short-term bandage for a gaping wound. But in light of the importance of this industry to our country's future, a plan deserves support.

Meanwhile, In The Wayne County Jail

Kwame Kilpatrick sits.

While I spent another Sunday trying to wrap my arms around watching Brett Farve toss the ball to Jets players on purpose, the former mayor of Detroit was sitting in his cell in the Wayne County jail, probably having the same thoughts about Farve.

What a waste. Not Brett Farve going to the big apple (that seems to have worked out for him), but Kilpatrick's fall from promise to prison. When he first took office many of us were filled with optimism, thinking this bright, charismatic leader would bring Detroit into a new era where the city and the suburbs worked together to give America another bustling metropolis along the lines of Chicago. But instead Kilpatrick turned out to be just another power-hungry politician who would use race, position, friends and even a skank skulking pager to grab and maintain power. What a terrific waste.

The former mayor is now serving 120 days behind bars and now it appears that one of his partners in crime, Christine Beatty, is about to strike a plea of her own (one that does include the phrase "yes, I want you too"). According to the Detroit News, Beatty is considering a guilty plea to reduce potential jail time and help all of us to take another step away from this embarrassing episode in the history of a proud city.

Please, Christine, take whatever they offer. Trust me, you are not only one who wants to put this whole sordid affair behind you.

The First Sunday Of Advent

For many churches today marks the beginning of the liturgical year. It is the fourth Sunday before Christmas, the first Sunday of advent. It is a season marked by a spirit of expectation and preparation as we ready to celebrate Christ's first coming in anticipation of his second.

May you find hope and peace in this time of promise.


"For a child has been born for us, a son given to us; authority rests upon his shoulders; and he is named Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace."
Isaiah 9:6-7

The Bad Guys Are Still Out There

While we were sitting around lamenting the economy and stuffing down turkey for a couple of days, we received a horrible reminder: the bad guys are still out there. Just because American intelligence agencies have been turning away post 9/11 psycho attacks like nerds on prom night it doesn't mean that the butchers aren't out there and just as deadly.

Witness India

Terrorist attacks on 10 sites in Mumbai have left at least 195 dead (including 6 Americans) and 300+ injured. 9 terrorists were killed and one was capture and is currently being interrogated . . . and something tells me the Indians will not get jelly-kneed should they need to consider water boarding for answers. Current reports list the terrorists as Pakistani and followers of radical Islam.

This gruesome attack on the people of India should illustrate to dozing Americans that the battle is not over. We are not fighting a war against Al-Qaeda, Osama Bin Laden or even the late-wormbait Saddam Hussein. They are (or were) just players in the war we are fighting against radical Islamic terrorism. Hunting down Bin Laden (who may already be dead) will not end the struggle. There are others, some not even associated with him, who share his hatred for "The Great Satan" and anyone else who stands in the way of their misguided Holy War.

We need to be vigilant. We need to be armed. We need to be victorious.

The Khaki Elephant Endorses Akindele Akinyemi For Outreach Chair Of The Michigan Republican Party

He said it best on his blog, "The Republican Party cannot go into the graveyards seeking answers." If you read Akindele's essays then you know he is a man of intense intelligence and solid beliefs, far from the failed outreach strategies that would be better left in the tomb. He's exactly the type of party leader who can help the GOP expand in a state that is contracting in so many ways.

I won't wish you good luck, Akindele. I don't believe in luck. So instead I wish you success. You'll be a great asset.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

You may not be feeling cranberry-stuffed love this Thanksgiving.

Maybe the country's economic woes have become your own. Perhaps you're fretting that Karl Marx will be smiling down on the Oval Office come January 20th. Or, it's possible that you are just a hate-filled, bitter human being. Whatever the cause, rest assured, there is a reason for you to be thankful today.

• A teacher taught you to read, allowing you to love, hate or feel informed apathy toward this blog.
• A mother gave birth to you, offering a chance for you to better the world you inhabit.
• If you're reading this there's a pretty good chance that you're not married to Michelle Obama.
• If you believe in God you can have heavenly hope. If you don't, you can feel earthly freedom.
• You're not currently pinned in a revolving door because somebody stuck a spear through your head.
• Soldiers have sacrificed for you. And they always will.
• There is majesty in a bird and grandeur in a snow flake.
• Barney Frank will not have any children.
• With keen eyes you can witness living magic through a child's unbridled imagination.
• Sometimes the wind really does whisper "Mary."
• Norm Coleman still leads Stuart Smalley in Minnesota.
• Regardless of your situation, a library can take you to Denmark with Hamlet, the moor of Dartmoor with Sherlock Holmes or Trantor with Hari Seldon.
• Salmon
• Unless you're one of my unfortunate neighbors, you don't have to watch me rake leaves, shovel snow or dance in the moonlight.
• You are alive and capable of making others thankful for that fact.
• No matter what you're doing today, you are not going to be served burned turkey by the creepy Rockwell woman in the picture I posted above

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

America's First Pro-Terrorist Attorney General?

I can't say that I disagree with Hillary Clinton as the Secretary of State. Given the ship of fools that Barack Obama was considering for the position, she seems the most capable of swimming should the ship sink.

And I like the idea of Obama keeping Robert Gates on board, even if it is an interim position, as the Defense Secretary. It's a dangerous world out there and it would be nice to have somebody who has actually had some experience fighting terrorism on Obama's team giving advice on how to dust thugs, even if he's only an interim thug duster.

But what in the name of Lionel Hutz is Obama thinking to foist Eric Holder on America as the Attorney General? This is the legal beagle "who played a major role" in the despicable pardon of ga-zillionaire fugitive (and Clinton financial supporter)Marc Rich, breaking a 200 year tradition of not pardoning fugitives who had never come to trial . . . but then, the Clinton administration also broke the 200+ year tradition of Presidents not having credible charges of rape against them, so maybe this is small potatoes.

But that wasn't the end of the pardon participation of Eric Holder. As Bill Clinton's deputy attorney he also played a role in the pardon of 16 murderous FALN terrorists and later, during the investigation of this particularly pardon (which included a bitch-slap from Orrin Hatch), attempted to defend the president's decision to pardon without any additional investigation of the clemency or conversation with the terrorist victims. And I suppose it goes without saying that Holder's team didn't attempt to get any information concerning deadly at large members of FALN, one of whom was on the FBI's 10 Most Wanted List at the time. That might have been intrusive to the terrorists.

And FALN members weren't the only terrorist on the Clinton pardon list that Holder sanctioned. There were also two Weather Underground terrorists, whose lengthy terrorism sentences were commuted. Wait, the Weather Underground? Didn't Obama have some connection to them as well? Anyway, given the FALN and Weather Underground pardons could it be that America will have its first pro-terrorist attorney general? Now that would be a CHANGE.

Of course, my favorite charming chapter from the tome of Eric Holder is that whole seizure of Elian Gonzalez dealio. You remember that debacle: the 11th Circuit Court of Appeals ruled that once INS chooses the guardian, and an application for asylum has been made by that guardian, the INS cannot choose a different guardian. But that is exactly what they did. And then Clinton's legal team (including Holder) ignored the ruling and ordered the boy seized without a court order.

Shortly after the seizure of Elian Gonzalez, Holder gave an interesting interview with Andrew Napolitano of Fox News:

Napolitano: When is the last time a boy, a child, was taken at the point of a gun without an order of a judge. Unprecedented in American history.

Holder: He was not taken at the point of a gun.

Oops. I guess Mr. Holder forgot that Alan Diaz snapped this shot that would snag a Pulitzer

But back to the interview . . .

Napolitano: Tell me, Mr. Holder, why did you not get a court order authorizing you to go in and get the boy?

Holder: Because we didn't need a court order. INS can do this on its own.

Napolitano: You know that a court order would have given you the cloak of respectability to have seized the boy.

Holder: We didn't need an order.

Napolitano: Then why did you ask the 11th Circuit Court of Appeals for such an order if you didn't need one?

Holder: [Silence]

Napolitano: The fact is, for the first time in history you have taken a child from his residence at gunpoint to enforce your custody position, even though you did not have an order authorizing it.

Clearing fugitives from justice. Freeing convicted terrorists. Seizing children at gunpoint without a court order. This is our new Attorney General? CHANGE?

It's Not Too Early

Who gets your early support for 2012?

Sweeping Up The Shards Of A Broken Dream

I've always considered myself an optimist at heart. Problems always had a humorous side; pain always contrasted neatly with bliss and provided the perfect opportunity for alcohol.

But one day your dreams are shattered. The shards scatter into a hundred fragments painfully piercing your joy. Hope pumps out of you with each heartbeat and you try to stop the bleeding by wrapping the wounds with pitiless self-indulgence.

Yet there is a healing balm. Not in trying to pick up those fractured pieces in a futile attempt to reassemble what is forever lost, but in sweeping up the shards of a broken dream to clear them forever from your life. There are new dreams waiting for us all if we make room for them. New opportunities to rise above destruction and do what we CAN to make our lives happily worth living.

Few people truly inspire me, but Dick and Rick Hoyt are among them. They are the father and son who form Team Hoyt and together compete in marathons, triathlons and other grueling feats of endurance -- an amazing thing when you consider that Rick can neither walk nor talk.

Theirs is a story of sweeping aside every family's dream of sweet health to make room for a new kind of hope. It is about love through action and inclusion. And it is a tale worth remembering.



Thanks for the link, Terry.

Barack Obama's Nature

I was just commenting on Angel's blog and it struck as to why I believe Barack Obama will eventually govern from the far, far left. Yes, I've heard pundits I respect like Dick Morris claim that Comrade Obama might just center his policies to survive, but I'm not feelin' it. Oh, he may give us a moderate start, but eventually we'll see the politics of his past on full display at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave.

Why do I believe this?

A scorpion and a frog meet on the bank of a stream and the scorpion asks the frog to carry him across on its back. The frog asks, "How do I know you won't sting me?" The scorpion answers, "Because I cannot swim and if I sting you, I will die as well."

The frog is satisfied and they set out, but in midstream the scorpion suddenly drives its lethal tail deep into the frog. The frog feels the onset of paralysis and starts to sink, knowing they both will drown, but has just enough strength to gasp "Why?"

Replies the scorpion: "Because . . . it's my nature."

I'm Gonna Miss W

It was nice having a Prez who wasn't afraid to slap the hummus out of Hamas or any other terrorist who had the misguided belief that they could tread on US.


Found the image at: GraniteGrok

How Obama Got Elected

This election cycle . . .

You knew the mainstream media traded hard-nose journalism for sloppy bumper sticker slants and agenda-driven stuff of fluff.

You knew that Obama supporters sputtered like clogged '63 Mercury Outboards when you asked them about Obama's past, present or policies.

So I give you, How Obama Got Elected:

Where Have All The Homeless Gone?

An amazing thing happens in America every time a Democratic President steps into the oval office: all discord and discontent disappears . . . or at least hourly cable coverage of discord and discontent disappears.

Remember when Bill Clinton was president? Television broadcasts and Hollywood productions simply stopped talking about icky-ugly things like poverty. In fact, if you never walked city streets you might have believed that the homeless had disappeared. Why, when Clinton was president virtually every paper carried stories about the fantastic economy while those same papers peddled doom and gloom during the Bush years, despite the fact that until the recent democrat-guided banking collapse the Bush economy was stronger than Clinton's. Oh, and do you remember how we were regaled with stories of how popular and beloved our slick Willie was . . . um, the same guy who never actually received even 50% of the popular vote in a national election? (But then, perhaps this is all a logical perspective from a group that believes treating "big business" like the Ripper treated White Chapel hookers will produce jobs.)

Well, as Ronald Reagan would say, here we go again. The day after Barack Obama was elected Wall Street suffered a record collapse, but the mainstream media passed of this violent corporate reaction to promised Red Square redistribution as a slump due to the economy Obama inherits. Nice whirl, Dervish. Get ready folks, in four years the Democrats will try to run against Bush again claiming that Comrade Obama's failed policies were the result of problems he inherited from Dubya.

Hours after Obama's election Russia aimed missiles at Poland while Hamas fired rockets into Israel, but the press ignored those violent maneuvers in the wake of Obama's rise and instead sought out Obama support parties around the globe to pretend that the world was a peaceful orgy of celebration.

And soon we'll hear stories of how popular and beloved President Barack Obama. The media will stop covering protests and flag burnings in front of American Embassies abroad (and, yes, I lived in Germany during the Clinton years and can confirm that they were hatin' on old glory back then too). Stories of the bad economy will disappear and we'll all be asking ourselves, "Where have all the homeless gone?"

A Child's Dream Of Space

Having grown up in Florida I've seen my share of space shuttle launches. I remember the first mission and the second (Coach Green even stopped football practice to watch Columbia's return to space). And later, of course, I remember watching those ominously split smoke trails streaming upward as my brother and I rushed to the radio to find out if something had happened to Challenger. But after a while the launches became just something ordinary that happened, like the Thursday night smell of Mrs. Ferdnor's overcooked meatloaf that wafted through the neighborhood.

How extraordinary that something so spectacular could become mundane.

Friday night I watched the Endeavor launch on FoxNews with my two sons sitting next to me. The truth is that I didn't even remember that it was scheduled. I was just clicking the remote to hear the man-comforting sound when I saw that familiar black and white form poised on the launchpad. I decided to call my boys in to watch. "T - 1:59." I figured they might enjoy it. And as ignition was reached I found myself looking from the TV to their spellbound faces and I discovered its wonder again.

The boys were transfixed as the spacecraft rocketed upward, taking them with it to a place of imagination. I was a child again, no longer wondering how much fuel or horsepower was being expended, but transported with my sons from our sofa toward a bold adventure to worlds where no one has gone before.

Children still dream of space. They always will. We always will.

Barack Obama's Secretary Of State

Right now it looks as though Barack Obama's field of candidates for his administration's Secretary of State has narrowed to a three horse race between Hillary Clinton, Bill Richardson and John Kerry (who would be automatic if I'd said "horse face" rather than "horse race"). Apparently Obama is turning to former political rivals to fill this critical foreign policy post since his friends have already shown disdain for our democratic allies.

Let me give some Washington outsider advice to the President Elect (and need I remind you, if his acolytes had listened to my advice we wouldn't be in the quaking quandary of calling him "President Elect"). When you line up the three candidates, who is the best of the worst?

John Kerry? Are you kidding me? While previous attacks on Kerry introduced the verb "swift boating" into pop dialogue, they also did something a little more important: they revealed the truth about John Kerry. His political and military careers are more fabrication than fact. This petticoat purse chaser constructed (and even filmed) bogus Vietnam data only to come back from the war to accuse his comrades of atrocities. He then joined the Senate and began a career that truly defined the word "atrocity." This is not the guy we want representing us to foreign leaders.

Bill Richardson? Likable guy, but you wouldn't trust him to pet your chinchilla. Face it, the Clintons made this guy's career. When Bill Clinton appointed Richardson as the U.S. Ambassador to the United Nations it threw him into the international spotlight. Unfortunately, he didn't pay much attention while he was there since he is oblivious to even the most obvious UN facts, like Russia's veto power on security resolutions. However, despite his ostrich-like observations, he did provide some support to the White House when he gave Monica Lewinsky a "shut your trap" position on his staff. Bill Clinton later appointed Richardson as the U.S. Secretary of Energy. And how did Richardson reward the Clintons for building his career? As soon as he saw the nomination tilting for Obama he hitched his political wagon to "The One" by endorsing him, instead of Hillary, for the presidency. So, while Obama may be tempted to reward this turncoat, he should remember that the high-priests didn't trust Judas either.

Hillary Clinton? What a loudmouthed, arrogant, contentious witch -- exactly what Obama needs in his administration. Listen, if you've been following The Khaki Elephant than you know that I am not a fan of the Clintons. Hillary is a left-wing ideologue who would take this country in the wrong direction. That said, I trust her more than Obama. While I don't agree with her on a number of issues, she is smart, tough and a cunning negotiator. If I had an international squabble, I'd want her on my side. And if you're choosing between these riders of the apocalypse, despite the baggage of Bill, she is far and away the most qualified choice.

Wolverines Lose 8 For The First Time Ever (Fire Rich Rod)

Today Northwestern beat Michigan, giving the Wolverines 8 losses (5 at home) for the first time ever. Today Ann Arbor suffers through the first losing gridiron season in over 40 years. 129 years of football tradition and now we have to witness Northwestern and Toledo victories in the Big House during the same season.

Look what Rich Rod has wrought.

I've said it before and I'll say it again. I don't care if there is a new system in place. I don't care if he lost his entire offense and most of his defense. I don't care if his name is fun to say.

Rich Rod needs to be fired!

Michigan doesn't rebuild. Michigan doesn't have off years. Michigan doesn't lose 5 home games.

Thanks a lot, Les Miles.

Sarah Palin "Africa" Smear Was A Blog Hoax

It turns out that Sarah Palin did know that Africa is a continent and not a country, but the media didn't know the difference between a blogger hoax and quotes from "an unnamed McCain campaign figure."

Read all about it here: A Senior Fellow at the Institute of Nonexistence

What Do You Get When Democrats Run Things?

A friend of mine sent this to me as an e-mail (thanks, Tim). Listen, I don't know if these facts are 100% true or not, but I'm not going to waste the time bouncing the data against snopes or myth-busting websites because, if it's not 100% legit, it sure as hell could be.

So what do the poorest places in America have in common (besides really bad polo venues)?

• Detroit , MI (1st on the poverty rate list) hasn't elected a Republican mayor since 1961
• Buffalo , NY (2nd) hasn't elected a Republican mayor since 1954
• Cincinnati , OH (3rd)...hasn't elected a Republican mayor since 1984
• Cleveland , OH (4th)...hasn't elected a Republican mayor since 1989
• Miami , FL (5th) has never had a Republican mayor
• St. Louis , MO (6th)....hasn't elected a Republican mayor since 1949
• El Paso , TX (7th) has never had a Republican mayor
• Milwaukee , WI (8th)...hasn't elected a Republican mayor since 1908
• Philadelphia , PA (9th)...hasn't elected a Republican mayor since 1952
• Newark , NJ (10th)...hasn't elected a Republican mayor since 1907.

Yup, there seems to be a trend.

Camille Paglia On Sarah Palin (Not Literally)

Philosopher, Art Critic, Feminist and Scholar Camilia Paglia has once again stepped beyond her personal politics to praise Palin's intelligence and warn the left of their visceral hate.

"Liberal Democrats are going to wake up from their sadomasochistic, anti-Palin orgy with a very big hangover. The evil genie released during this sorry episode will not so easily go back into its bottle. A shocking level of irrational emotionalism and at times infantile rage was exposed at the heart of current Democratic ideology"

American Princess has a fantastic take on Paglia's latest piece.

Katie Couric Is Flippin' Insane

Katie Couric laid some advice on Sarah Palin at Glamour Magazine's 2008 Women of the Year Awards, "I think she should keep her head down, work really hard and learn about governing." Whoa, wait a minute . . . the woman who's viewer ratings regularly hover between record breaking lows and "honey, switch over to channel 13 or we're going to miss the Manimal marathon" is presuming to give advice to a woman who's governing has Alaskans happily forgetting that . . . well, they're Alaskans?

Let me uncork the wine. OK, Palin has an 80% approval rating as governor, forced the oil companies to give each Alaskan resident $1,654 annually, balanced the budget and lowered state taxes -- but according to Couric she needs to "learn about governing."

We already know that Couric is far from an expert in her own field or during her interview with Joe Biden she would have corrected him when he boldly proclaimed that President Franklin Roosevelt "got on the television" to talk about the stock market crash . . . um, Herbert Hoover was President in 1929 and TVs were about as common as iPhones. Ah, but why should Couric know about her teet of television when she implies an encyclopedic knowledge of what it takes to govern? However, given her criticism of Palin's abilities despite scoring the highest gubernatorial approval ratings in the country (and Katie constantly references Bush's approval ratings so she must like thinking about them), I'm left wondering who Couric thinks has worked hard and understands governing.

Perhaps Maryland's Martin O'Malley (D) who's $1.4 billion tax increase will soon bring the state an apparition of the Holy Virgin insisting that they change their name to "Buddahland or Vishnuland or something with less association with the mother of God, thank you very much."

Or maybe Katie admires the really hard work of New Mexico's Bill Richardson (D) who, after Russia's invasion of Georgia said we "could get the Security Council to pass a strong resolution getting the Russians to show some restraint," apparently forgetting from his time as an ambassador to the UN that Russia has a veto power over Security Council resolutions.

No, my money is on Michigan's own Jennifer Granholm (D). Why, Granholm has presided over the worst state economy in the country for the past six years (which oddly earned her a position on Barack Obama's economic advisory board). On top of that, while businesses left Michigan and headed to fiscal friendly Red states like Tennessee, Granholm pushed the envelope by raising personal income tax 17% to really bug-crush any hope of progress. Why, her lack of gubernatorial success is the antithesis to what Sarah Palin has accomplished, so why wouldn't a product of inverse insanity like Katie Couric find her admirably learned?

Governor Perles

Should Michigan survive the disastrous Granholm years, 74 year old George Perles is on the bench waiting for his call to become the next governor of Michigan.

Coach Perles guided the Michigan State Spartans to a pair of Big 10 titles and a Rose Bowl victory during his tenure as the head football coach, even serving as school's athletic director during the last couple of years. He was also one of the founders of The Motor City Bowl. Oh, oh, and he's been elected to the Michigan State University board of trustees. Given the fact that the Democrats have given us the likes of Jennifer Granholm and Jefferey Feiger as candidates, the coach's qualifications seem stone solid to me.

And I know what you're thinking, could George make things any worse for the state? Well, relative to where Jenny has taken us, a pink ballerina hippo bedridden from the gout couldn't make things worse. In fact, maybe that's who the GOP will nominate to counter the coach.

Veterans Day 2008

Today is a day to remember those who have made the ultimate sacrifice to keep Old Glory flying, to thank those who walk among us having answered the call of duty, and pray for those who still stand in harm's way to defend our liberty from tyranny.

God bless those who have served: The Air Force, The Army, The Navy, The Marines, The Coast Guard. Those veterans who fought for their country and those who were never called to take up arms but stood at the ready.

One of the reasons that I am a Republican is our party's concept of America. While Democrats scrambled after 9/11 to find out what we had done wrong and worry incessantly about what the world thinks of us or how we can become more like Europeans, Republicans see America as that shining light on a hill. We see America as flawed, but great; imperfect, but profound in our message of hope. And while the world criticizes us from beneath our protective umbrella, we stand unique as both voice and fist of freedom.

This is the vision of America that surges through our military. This is the idea that makes those men and women determined for victory yet tempered for justice. This is why they deserve every American's respect, admiration and gratitude.

Anniversary Of The Wreck Of The Edmund Fitzgerald (November 10, 1975)

The legend lives on from the Chippewa on down
Of the big lake they called 'Gitche Gumee'

The lake, it is said, never gives up her dead
When the skies of November turn gloomy
With a load of iron ore twenty-six thousand tons more
Than the Edmund Fitzgerald weighed empty.
That good ship and true was a bone to be chewed
When the gales of November came early.

The ship was the pride of the American side
Coming back from some mill in Wisconsin
As the big freighters go, it was bigger than most
With a crew and good captain well seasoned
Concluding some terms with a couple of steel firms
When they left fully loaded for Cleveland
And later that night when the ship's bell rang
Could it be the north wind they'd been feelin'?

The wind in the wires made a tattle-tale sound
And a wave broke over the railing
And every man knew, as the captain did too,
T'was the witch of November come stealin'.
The dawn came late and the breakfast had to wait
When the Gales of November came slashin'.
When afternoon came it was freezin' rain

In the face of a hurricane west wind.

When suppertime came, the old cook came on deck

Sayin' fellas, it's too rough to feed ya.
At Seven P.M. a main hatchway caved in

He said fellas, it's been good t'know ya
The captain wired in he had water comin' in
And the good ship and crew was in peril.
And later that night when his lights went out of sight

Came the wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald.

Does any one know where the love of God goes
When the waves turn the minutes to hours?
The searchers all say they'd have made Whitefish Bay
If they'd put fifteen more miles behind her.
They might have split up or they might have capsized;
They may have broke deep and took water.
And all that remains is the faces and the names
Of the wives and the sons and the daughters.

Lake Huron rolls, Superior sings
In the rooms of her ice-water mansion.
Old Michigan steams like a young man's dreams;
The islands and bays are for sportsmen.
And farther below Lake Ontario
Takes in what Lake Erie can send her,
And the iron boats go as the mariners all know
With the Gales of November remembered.

In a musty old hall in Detroit they prayed,
In the Maritime Sailors' Cathedral.
The church bell chimed till it rang twenty-nine times
For each man on the Edmund Fitzgerald.
The legend lives on from the Chippewa on down
Of the big lake they call 'Gitche Gumee'.
Superior, they said, never gives up her dead
When the gales of November come early!

© 1976 Moose Music, Inc.

SS Edmund Fitzgerald Online

Sniveling Cowards Attack Sarah Palin

Trying to redirect criticism of the failed campaign they coordinated, anonymous voices within the McCain . . . make that former McCain campaign staff launched a series of cowardly attacks against Sarah Palin reminiscent of, well, cowardly anonymous attacks from trolls across the blogosphere.

These Benedict A-holes shot gossip to Newsweek and FoxNews claiming that Palin is an ignorant, harsh-tempered, fashion obsessed Diva who answers the door wearing nothing but a towel and a smile. Naturally Palin blasted the rumors. And those who actually know her call the accusations absolutely ludicrous. The Alaskan governor even went so far as to invite journalists to check out her Alaskan home and closet to measure her Diva-osity. No word as to whether she offered to greet them with naught but a towel.

But the question that keeps bothering me is where is John McCain in all of this? Some in his staff are attempting to salvage their careers by throwing Saracuda under the blue wave of Obama's election . . . a vain effort if you ask me since Palin's place in the GOP is secure while they (once we find out who "they" are) will now become caribou in season. That said, isn't it time for John McCain to step forward and defend his Veep choice?

Where are you Senator McCain?

Check out Michelle Malkin's take on this (you won't be sorry): "Cowards: The character assassination of Sarah Palin"

Jennifer Granholm . . . An Economic Advisor??

Barack Obama added Jennifer Granholm to his board of economic advisers. Yes, Jennifer Granhom the Governor of Michigan. That's right, the same governor who has led the Great Lakes State to its worst 6-year economic stretch since sieur Antoine de Lamothe-Cadillac scrambled out of his skiff to form Detroit and lay a fire water tax on the natives.

In other news, Obama added Captain Edward J. Smith to his naval advisory board, named General George Armstrong Custer as chief military advisor and demanded that all secret service agents be given red shirts.

Obama Victory: The Aftermath

The Onion Reports. You decide.



H/T: PaleoCon Command Center

Will We Ever Elect Another Old White Dude?

A talking head on the radio blathered out that Barack Obama has broken through the electorate constructed barrier of only electing old white men. He said it with confidence and the show's host supplied a verbal nod of agreement. And as I reflected on the point I found myself eventually rolling down the car window and shouting to the world "WTF?!" (which I shouted as letters since saying the words would have been inappropriate given the Dodge Caravan rocking to Laurie Berkner right next to me).

Khaki Factoid: The era of electing old white dudes ended with Ronald Reagan.

When America elected the Gipper, we voted for the promise of his integrity and experience, but since then we have sided with youth and enthusiasm. OK, we did elect George H.W. Bush, but it's hard to count that election since everybody was voting for a third Reagan term. When Bush the senior ran for a second term on his own merit he lost to the younger sax and sack playing Bill Clinton. And in the next election Clinton defeated the age-staggered, pen-pointing, 3rd-person-referencing Bob Dole.

Dubya's first run was an age-negated race with both candidates recent car seat graduates (and America's indecision showed with a split between the popular and electoral tallies). But when he faced a man who eerily reassembled the crypt keeper, Dubya won both the popular and E-College votes.

And now there is McCain's lose to the younger, hipper, more Holden Caulfieldish Barack Obama.

Politics aside, all sane Americans would agree that electing the first African-American President has the positive effect of providing hope to all Americans that the American Dream belongs to everyone. But as far as the age thing -- you know, given the direction this country has gone since Reagan . . . maybe we should give the old guys another chance.

Why Did John McCain Lose?

For the next few days, weeks, months . . . and in the case of this historic election . . . years, "experts" will pour over exit polls and demographics like maggots on days-old dung to explain why John McCain lost (and yes, I felt the need to use the word "maggot" today . . . and yes, I will focus on why McCain lost rather than Obama's win because of the type of uphill battle the republican had . . . and yes I will keep using ellipses . . . does this trouble you?).

You'll hear lots of explanations for the outcome. Like, oh, for example:

• People were angry at Dubya. True, but then you have yo ask yourself why couldn't McCain convince independents and centrist democrats of the very thing that had conservative republicans threatening to hit the poles instead of the polls . . . primarily the fact that McCain was far from being Bush?
  
• Sarah Palin was a bad choice. Listen, if Dan Quayle didn't cost Papa Bush his first election, then don't fool yourself into blaming Palin (unless you're a McCain advisor trying to commit career suicide by attacking a now powerful Republican voice). Examine the people who hate Palin or said that they wouldn't vote for McCain because of her . . . they were either going to vote for Obama anyway or they have the reasoning faculties of a rusted lawn chair. According to the exit polls referenced on CNN, among those who think a Vice President actually matters Palin probably pulled in an extra 3 or 4 points for Mac. But for most people the VP choice just doesn't mean much. No American President has ever won or lost an election based on their Veep.
  
• The mainstream media was in the tank for Obama. There is no doubt that it's true. For the sake of argument, let's skip the fact that, oh around 80% of them vote democratic and that Katie Couric keeps the cold shower running after an Obama interview. Instead let's look at undeniable facts . . . network expenditures. Brit Hume (who would never lie) produced numbers on the amount of money each network spent following the candidates and the number was around 3 to 1 in favor of Obama. In fact, even the "conservative" FoxNews spent more money following Obama than McCain. But does it really matter? Republicans have overcome the media in the past. The mainstream press hates Dubya and he was elected . . . twice.
  
• Americans wanted to vote for an African American. For some this is true. When I went into work on election day a white colleague of mine was smiling ear-to-ear and when I asked her how she was doing she said, "Fantastic! We're going to elect our first black president!" Interesting . . . she didn't say "a democrat in the White House" or "a liberal behind the country's wheel" or even "somebody who isn't named Bush." Her first inclination was to identify Obama by pigmentation. So yes, everyone knew he would carry the black vote, which tends to be largely monolithic anyway (excepting mavericks like Neo and 'Zo), and that he would draw in white-guilt sufferers, but seeing color they would have voted democratic anyway. So I doubt the color of his skin did anything beyond proving that America is not a racist country . . . or it never could have elected a black man with little experience and ties to William Ayers and several anti-Semitic friends and organizations.
  
• Ohio Sucks. The Buckeye state went blue and no Republican has ever won the presidency without Ohio. But this is a symptom rather than a cause.

Yes, you'll read all sorts of reason as to why the election went the way that it did, with each day finding a new "expert" searching for a different angle. Was it McCain's age? Did the GOP leave their conservative values? Was it ACORN enhanced voter fraud? How about the death of Obama's grandma? Biden's saucy hair plugs? A heavy Venusian body-snatching turnout? But don't be fooled. There is one reason and one reason alone why Obama won. And it is as simple as it is obvious.

Mammon

When Barack Obama decided to renege on his agreement to public funding he won the election.

Before securing the Democratic nomination, Obama told the world "If I am the Democratic nominee, I will aggressively pursue an agreement with the Republican nominee to preserve a publicly financed general election." Hillary Clinton and John McCain made the same commitment. The difference is that, John McCain kept his word (and something tells me that Hillary would have as well)

As the WSJ put it, by flip-flopping on public funding, Obama "probably dealt a death-blow to the cause of campaign-finance reform." You see, in keeping his promise, John McCain decided to adhere to the financing restrictions so he had spending limits and could not accept private donations after 1 September - the official start of the campaign. In breaking his promise Obama was swimming in cash, collecting about as much as Bush and Kerry combined in the last election . . . leading to blech-fest infomercials and campaign ads at levels that have never been seen before. Sure, McCain put out ads distancing himself from Bush, blaming Fannie & Freddie on the Democrats and explaining his own policies . . . but they were drown out by the deluge of Obama spots that only the gobs of money collected outside of public finance restrictions could have bankrolled.

So Barack Obama's financial pledge reversal had two effects:

1) Obama won the election.

2) Campaign Finance agreements between the parties are gone forever. I doubt any future candidate will accept the restrictions of Public Finance or trust the word of their opponent when it comes to money. . . so expect the 2012 election to see more Benjis than a scruffy K-9 film revival . . . and expect lots of future ellipses from The Khaki Elephant

Wall Street Celebrates Obama Election With Record Plunge

It seems that Wall Street took Barack Obama's campaign promise to tax rich folk and big corporations seriously as the Dow plummeted 486 points, the worst post-election collapse ever recorded.

Wow, he's only the President Elect and already bringing in Change!

This is going to be an interesting four years.

Russia Celebrates Obama Election By Aiming Missles At Poland

Hours after the election results, Russian President Dmitry Medvedev announced that there would be an old-school Russian deployment of short-range missiles aimed at Poland.

Welcome, President-Elect Obama. It seems the Russians believe there'll be an apple-eyed appeaser in the White House.

NOTE: Could be that Joe Biden was actually right about something.

Congratulations To Barack Obama

My fellow Republicans,

Let's set aside the hate. For eight years we have watched liberals burn effigies of the president, behead images of the free world's leader and call our commander-in-chief "Hitler." But their ways are not our ways.

Let's set aside the hate. Barack Obama has won the election. While we didn't vote for him (or shouldn't have) he deserves our respect as the President Elect and our prayers for wisdom and discernment.

Let's set aside the hate. Based on his record we will have plenty to criticize in the coming years. He will attack the 1st Amendment with the Fairness Doctrine. He will attack the 2nd Amendment with additional taxes and bans. He will attack the 4th Amendment with his threatened civil force. His position on Abortion is extreme. His threats to cut military spending in this dangerous world are terrifying. And his redistribution of wealth philosophy will do what it always does to employment rates. There will be plenty to attack. But do so without the tormented images that we have seen from the Left for the past eight years.

And for tonight, congratulations Senator Obama.