Renaming Acts Of God

Let me guess, it's global climate change that caused two storms to pass through my area taking away Ben Franklin's gift while dropping trees on unsuspecting houses. If that's the case, then how are insurance companies going to handle claims that used to be labeled "acts of God." If it's my fault because I ran my mower during an ozone awareness day, isn't it time we stop blaming the big guy? Or maybe this should be considered an Act of SUVs.

Now if this really was an act of God then I have a bone to pick with the Almighty.

Lord, thou knowest that I try to be a good father. But please, I beg of thee, let the school of my children reopen so I can return to work. I have not the strength nor endurance of a homemaker. They have conquered my will and I beg respite. I ask this in thy Holy name. Amen