Barack Obama Jokes

Things getting a little dull around the water cooler? Been a while since you've taken a trip to your company's HR department? Why not try out one of the Barack Obama jokes collected here (to be used at your discretion).

Q: What do Barack Obama and Osama Bin Laden have in common?
A: They both have friends who have bombed the Pentagon.

Q: Why did Obama cross the road?
A: To help the other side.

Q: Why won't Obama release his real birth certificate?
A: It shows that he wasn't born of a virgin.

Q: Why won’t Obama laugh at himself?
A: Because it would be racist.

Q: Why do cemeteries have fences?
A: To keep out ACORN vote recruiters.

Q: What’s the difference between Ross Perot and Barack Obama?
A: Ross Perot is a crackpot with big ears; Barack Obama is a crackhead with big ears.

Q: Why doesn’t Obama drink Pepsi?
A: He thinks that things go better with coke.

Q: Why did Obama change his name from Barry to Barack?
A: He thought Barry sounded too American.

Q: Why did Obama say that the madrassa where he went to school wasn’t a “radical” one?
A: They didn’t have live ammo training exercises.

Q: Why does Obama want to take the oath of office in a baseball stadium?
A: So he can deliver his sermon on the mound.

John McCain, Hillary Clinton, and Barack Obama Barack all die and go to heaven. God looks down from his throne and asks McCain, "Do you think you deserve to be in heaven?"McCain takes a breath and then replies, "Well, I think so because I was a great leader and tried to follow the words in your great book." God looks down and then says, "You can sit to my left side."

So, McCain takes his seat and then God asks the same question to Hillary, "Do you think you deserve to be in heaven?"Hillary thinks for a second and then replies, "I think so because I have been fighting for the rights of so many people for so long." God again looks down and this time says, "You can sit to my right side."Finally God turns to Barack Obama and asks, "Do you think you deserve to be in heaven?"Obama replies, "You're in my seat."


BONUS JOE BIDEN JOKE:

Q: Why did Joe Biden get a hair transplant?
A: To hide the mark of the beast.