Finding Change In Obama's Team

I've found change under the cushions. I've found change in my car's ashtray. I've even found change behind children's ears . . . in the cool "magician" way, not in the creepy "I've also got some candy in my van" way. But I have to admit, I'm having a hard time finding any of that much promised CHANGE in the presidential team that Barack Obama is putting together. In fact, not only is he loading his team with Washington retreads, he's not even picking innovative quality retreads. These spinners are just loaded with old-school dirt.

So far he's given us a chief of staff, Rahm Emanuel, a former advisor to Bill Clinton who had numerous conversations with Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich while the Gov was trying to sell Obama's former senate seat. But No worries, The Chosen One told the press that he looked into it an there was no wrong doing so we can let it go. Phew!

In addition, Obama has recommended an Attorney General, Eric Holder, who spent his previous stint in Washington working to pardon ga-zillionaire fugitive Marc Rich and 16 members of the FALN terrorist organization. But don't be concerned about this retread, The Messiah checked him out and gave him his blessing, so no further investigation is needed. Phew!

For Secretary of State Obama pegged the ultimate Washington insider, Hillary Clinton, who currently carries some baggage in that some of the country's she will be "negotiating" with are already in bed with her husband . . . not literally . . . that we know of . . . by donating tons of cash to his ventures. Some might consider this a dangerous conflict of interest, but no worries, The Sacred Elected Guy has already informed the press that they need dig no deeper because he has already investigated and given this appointment the green light. Phew!

Now we have Obama's choice for Secretary of Treasury, Timothy Geithner, (you got it, another long-time Washington insider) who failed to pay some $34,000 from 2001-2004, presumably because he didn't understand the code. Ah, so the guy who'll be in charge of the IRS is a tax dodger who doesn't understand tax code. On top of that, his housekeeper was an illegal . . . wonder how he wrote off her salary? But forget about it. The Voice of Change has already looked into Geithner's background so there's no need for any additional questions. Phew!

The mantra for change rang throughout his campaign and now we're finally getting a glimpse of what that vision really meant: gather those who have spent their lifetime in Washington and put them in positions of power . . . but only after you're sure they have scurrilous backgrounds.

Luckily we don't have to worry. Don't ask, don't toil. Barack Obama said they're OK and that should be good enough for everybody. Phew!